As I write this, it's November 30: my child's Advent calendar is hanging downstairs, still empty, for her to find in the morning. Rather than fill it with trinkets that will soon be forgotten by her (but not by our planet), I'm planning to fill it with 25 ways to say "We love you."
This list won't be exclusive to the Christmas season, of course. And the "we love you" could easily be "I love you" for the single parents out there (I get it -- I was raised by one).
I'm big on love notes
If you've been following my page for a minute, you likely know that I'm big on love notes. I leave them randomly for my child to find at least a couple of times per week, and when I take a hiatus from writing them, she's quick to ask for more.
Kids need to hear "We love you"
Words of affirmation are a bonafide love language. Some children thrive more on them than others do, but I've rarely met a child who flat-out doesn't like to hear that we think the world of them. Deep down, I believe that all children have a deep desire to know that we're so glad they exist.
For December of this year--although I'm likely to repurpose them at other times, as well--these are the notes I'll divide into 25 distinctly differently decorated love notes for my child's Advent calendar.
We love you because you’re brave.
We love you because you’re kind.
We love you because you care about others.
We love you because you value inner beauty more than outer beauty.
We love you because you’re open to learning new things.
We love you because you don’t give up easily. You’re resilient
We love you because you play so well.
We love you because you love to dance.
We love you because you’re not afraid to be different from other kids.
We love you because you trust your body and the messages it gives you.
We love you because you’re not afraid to stand up for yourself.
We love you because you care deeply about the injustices of the world and want to do something about them.
We love you because you’re loyal to those you love.
We love you because you’re not afraid to make mistakes; you know they’re teachers.
We love you because you’re gentle with animals.
We love you because you consider your friends’ and others’ feelings.
We love you because you’re funny.We love you because of the way you express yourself artistically.
We love you because you treat your body well.
We love you because you believe in things that are greater than yourself.
We love you because you help us slow down and see what matters most in life.
We love you because you sing with so much passion!
We love you because you fit on our laps so very comfortably.
We love you because you’re adventurous.
We love you because you’d be worthy of love even if you did none of the other things we’ve written about here. You’re worthy of love because you ARE.
How do you feel after reading this list?
Although this list is customized to my child, there's a part of my inner child that needed to hear some of these things, too. What is your child needing to hear? How about your inner child? It's amazing how healing putting a little bit of love on paper can be...it's a living record of what we feel all the time, and here, we're pausing to acknowledge it. To me, that feels really good.
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I am not a physician, psychologist, or counselor, nor am I licensed to offer therapy or medical advice of any kind. I am a certified conscious parenting coach and my courses, blog posts, and all other guidance are based on my training and experience. If you are having an emergency or are in crisis please call 911, or the National Suicide Prevention Line (800-273-8255), or text the Crisis Text Line at 741741.
Sarah R. Moore
Sarah R. Moore is a certified Master Parenting Trainer, an author (book coming soon), an armchair neuroscientist, and most importantly, a Mama. She's a lifelong learner with formal training in child development, improv comedy, trauma recovery, and interpersonal neurobiology. She offers a popular series of mini-courses (including her FREE video, Three Keys to Positive Parenting). She helps bring JOY, EASE, and CONNECTION back to families.
You can follow her on Facebook, Pinterest, and Instagram. She’s currently worldschooling her family.